THERE IS DEEP MAGIC IN SHOWING UP FIERCELY, JOYFULLY ALIVE.
Your body holds the keys to your joy.
The wisdom available in your body serves as your vessel, your compass, your way home. And for a long time (centuries, eons, in fact) – we have been taught to disconnect from that power and possibility. To see our bodies as dangerous, something to be controlled and feared, to be tamed and quieted, rather than as a source for our joy and creativity.
YOU ARE A TRUTH-SEEKER. A VISIONARY. A CREATIVE SOUL WITH A CALLING TO SOMETHING GREATER.
You can see (or at least feel) the possibilities of a different way of being, and know that the REAL you- the one that lives somewhere behind the social niceties, responsibilities, and patterns of safety and conventionality- is itching to come out, experience deep joy, and create an unshakeable trust in who you are and what you are capable of.
The keys reside in your body. The stories you’ve lived, the beliefs you’ve taken on, the desires you hold close- all of these energies are locked up inside, dictating how your life is playing out.
Every human has a power within them that has been discounted and cast aside for generations. Encouraged to make yourself smaller, control your weight, tame your desires, hide the functions of your body, many humans (particularly those socialized female) have an at BEST truce with their bodies, and at worst a full on war raging with every bite eaten, every calorie tracked, every tug of jeans over a soft belly spot.
With so many ways out there to “fix” or “improve” yourself, it becomes entirely too easy to focus on what’s lacking, rather than directing your energy toward things that bring you joy and channeling your creative potential into completing projects and fulfilling self-expression.
IT’S TIME TO WALK AWAY FROM FOCUSING ON THE PROBLEMS AND CHOOSE A LIFE OF INTENTION, JOY, AND CREATIVITY.
How? Well, everything is connected. Body, Health, Work, Relationships — something happening in one area will often shed light on another. What we focus on in one area will often lead to changes in another.
YOUR BODY TELLS YOUR STORY.
The story of your past, of your present, and of all the intricate inner workings of your energy, physical experience, emotions, and mind.
When you know how to listen to the story and interpret the signals your body is sending you, your relationship with her is transformed. Rather than being at war with her, you feel at home within her. Rather than feeling constantly betrayed by your body, you trust her with absolute certainty.
YOUR BODY WILL NEVER LEAD YOU ASTRAY.
Mindset, beliefs, and societal pressure will.
We are taught from a young age to give our authority over to something outside of ourselves. To trust the media, our families, our teachers, books, experts, the neighbor, organizations we belong to before we trust ourselves and our own inner wisdom.
We hand over our power, often without knowing it, realizing it, or having any other choices, in order to survive in this world.
No one teaches us how to turn inward and receive answers from our souls.
No one teaches us how to read and interpret the signals and messages from our bodies.
No one teaches us how to feel, express, and process out our emotions so they don’t get stuffed down and become stuck energy in our systems.
Slowly we become more and more bound up by societal norms, throwing our own knowing out the window and asking someone else for the answer. We put our trust not in the wisdom within, but in literally anything else that comes our way. Every time you listen to someone or something else over yourself, it’s like another knot being tied in the bindings keeping you complacent, keeping you stuck, keeping you feeling like you’re never really going to feel free, worthy, happy, and whole.
This is not your fault. This is the world we live in. As much as you may immediately want to beat yourself up for not knowing better or figuring it out (how many times have you already tried to figure it out and do it differently?), this is not helpful. It’s more of the same.
The smart, deep feeling humans who come to me and choose this work go from shutting down their emotions to expressing themselves with joy and ease. They change jobs, deepen commitments, find love, and create really great art. They go from constantly battling with body image and not feeling good enough to creating a relationship with their bodies they feel really good about, and feeling the worthiness of who they are from within themselves.
You can have this too, if you choose.
Choose to learn how to talk to your body.
Choose to face the patterns, beliefs, and emotions you’ve been taught not to see or stuff down.
Choose to go through a process of unbinding- clearing away and untying the knots of conditioning and fears that have kept you where you are.
Choose to understand your energy, what that means, and how to get rid of anything that’s *not* you.
Choose to stick with it, even when it gets hard.
Choose to step out of a cycle of proving and striving.
Choose to stand fiercely in your joy, even if other people have a hard time with it.
Choose to fill your life with experiences, actions, people, and places that nourish your creative spirit and support your self-expression.
Because on the other side of these choices?
SO. MUCH. JOY.
My Liberation + Reclamation
Ten years ago I was attending university, double majoring, working three jobs, playing competitive ultimate frisbee, writing a thesis, and prepping my senior art show project. I thrived on having multiple things going on, being someone that others relied on, pulling off impossible feats of scheduling and creation.
On the outside, everything looked great- I was getting straight As, always had a smile on my face, loved my classes and the work I was doing, was on track for getting a great job after school was over. I had friends, exercised regularly, was committed to my art and writing, and was consistently praised by teachers, co-workers, and teammates.
On the inside, it was a different story. I was out drinking six nights a week, constantly exhausted, and popping pills to stay awake to get all my work done. A year earlier I had come back from a semester abroad up twenty pounds, heartbroken, and feeling incredibly lonely. I had always felt uncomfortable in my body- I started thinking at age eight how my body was too big to be pretty, and only had that reinforced by teen magazines, boys at school, and tv shows throughout growing up. By the time I was wrapping up university ten years ago, I had a full-blown scale addiction, weighing myself sometimes upwards of 16 times a day.
I would go back and forth between counting every calorie and binging on burritos at 4am. I would find any excuse to pop into a bathroom or locker room and step on the scale. I hinged my entire sense of worth on the numbers I would see, and no matter what that scale said it always came up different than what would finally make me “enough”.
Whenever I got sick (about every six weeks, given my insane schedule), I felt like my body had betrayed me. I would pinch my belly, clench my fists, and wonder what was wrong with me- why couldn’t I do it all?
The worst part was, I “knew better”. The thesis I was writing was called “A Question of Beauty: How Advertising Controls the Standards for Women’s Identity and Social Success”. The whole thing was based on my extensive studying of advertising, how women’s bodies are portrayed in art, society, and culture, and the psychological tactics used to convince women they aren’t good enough so that they would buy more products.
I knew exactly what was going on, and told everyone I thought would listen about it, but I couldn’t stop doing it myself. I never once really believed that I was capable of being loved and deserving of happiness while my body didn’t fit conventional standards of beauty, didn’t submit to my every request and will. No matter how hard I tried to control her, tame her, make her obedient- she just kept having a will of her own, desires, and needs to be met that didn’t fit in with how it was “supposed to be”.
All of the knowledge to do it differently existed in my head. I could explain it to anyone and argue it eloquently. But I didn’t know how to integrate or embody any of the information. And that felt worse than not knowing at all.
There is so much of my story I could share with you here.
How I moved to a new city and my scale broke in the move, giving me a chance to try a new way of being, where I didn’t weigh myself 24/7.
How I became a yoga instructor, and felt connected to my body for the first time in my life.
How I accidentally became a fitness instructor, teaching spin, barre, kettlebells, and even adult gymnastics classes.
How after years of this, no matter how strong my body became or how much I learned about anatomy and physiology, no matter how much I studied the Bhagavad Gita and other yoga philosophies and texts, no matter how much I learned about nutrition and how clean I ate – I still felt devoid of worthiness. Invisible to love and support. I looked the way I always wanted to look, and it still wasn’t enough.
I realized that in my efforts to help people live their best lives through fitness, I was actually helping them punish themselves in the same ways I would punish myself and my body. And that I had slowly slipped back into old patterns of calorie counting and weight policing- the difference was it came in the form of community body fat loss challenges and measuring macros. It was all sanctioned, even celebrated, rather than being kept secret. But I still felt exactly the same- ashamed. Not good enough. Waiting to be worthy.
When I finally left the fitness industry I had come a long way. I had hired my first life coach, who helped me connect with my body in a very different way, and helped me look at all the fear and aversion I had to being a woman – for I had believed that feminine equaled weak, someone who succumbed to all that crap in fashion magazines.
I was already working with people one on one, using my peer facilitation trainings, infinite possibilities certification, workshops and studies of how energy, creativity, and movement are connected, and a long history of being the friend everyone came to for advice as a jumping off point for what would become this business.
For years I dove into the study of energy, healing techniques, somatic practices, and ancient philosophies as part of my own journey toward deep, embodied self-love and self-acceptance. My studies took me all over the world- Ireland, Costa Rica, Chile, Bali, to name a few. I was traveling, and I was seeking. To understand myself, to re-orient my relationship with my body, to unbind from all the conditioning that led me toward self-hatred and disembodiment in the first place.
And I haven’t stopped. The more I learn about our bodies and our energetic systems, the more I see just how much there is to know. Just how much is possible beyond this current reality.
As I learn, grow, and deepen in my own practices and knowing, so do my clients.
A Joyful Human is a human who is free.
They are connected to their body, their energy, their soul, and their place in the world.
They are nourished and full, and know how to get their needs met.
They are sovereign in their life and in their power, with a deep capacity for connection, creativity, and celebration in all areas of their life.
JOYFUL HUMANS HAVE GREAT BOUNDARIES.
They are perpetual students who know how to not just take in information, but how to decide what’s true for them and what to leave behind, how to integrate what they are learning in a holistic, healthy way, and have tapped into the childlike awe and wonder of the world that has always been inside them.
JOYFUL HUMANS CLAIM THEIR INNER AUTHORITY AND POWER.
They know that truth will always signal from within, and trust themselves above all else- regardless of how convenient it is for anyone else.
They know how to call their power back to them from anywhere it may go, and have mastered their energy in all areas of their lives.
JOYFUL HUMANS WILLINGLY WALK THROUGH THE FIRE, BURNING AWAY EVERYTHING THAT IS NOT HERE IN SERVICE OF THEIR HIGHEST GOOD, TRUTH, AND POWER.
They face their fears, welcome support, and actively work together to create a world where everyone feels loved, heard, accepted, and whole.
A HUMAN DEEPLY EMBODYING JOY IS LIKE A PHOENIX.
They burn away the ties that bind them, unmaking themself in order to rise from the ashes, stronger and more powerful than ever before. They choose liberation. They choose mastery. They choose power. Not just for themself, but for the good of the world.
This is possible for you.
All humans have the power to become Joy.
To liberate their bodies.
To master their energy.
To claim their worth and truth across all time and space.
When you are ready to embark on this journey, you will know.
And when you feel that call, that nudge, that pull toward this new reality- I’ll be here waiting as your guide.